Written By Empress Of Pearl Powder
Sarah Anderson May 31, 2023
In this day and age of busyiness “Do more and be more,” it's easy to feel like we're just not enough, or that taking time for ourselves is selfish, or that we don't care about others. However, self-love is pivotal for our wellbeing and can throw everything else off balance if not supported.
Happiness begins with loving yourself, every beautiful inch of yourself, no matter what anyone else thinks - and forgiving yourself, too.
What Is Self-Love
When hearing the term "self-love," some may think of self-absorption or selfishness. There is a self-love which is corrupt, but there is another type of self-love that is our greatest duty; we must have a due concern for the welfare of our own souls and bodies.
Self-love does not mean we are being narcissistic, egotistical, conceited, or consider ourselves better than others, nor being full of ourselves.
There is a way to love ourselves without becoming self-focused, by not looking only to our own interests, but also the interests of others. There is a balance of loving ourselves enough to care for our own needs while loving others.
Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing our well-being to please others.
Self-love is acknowleding that to be your best you need to take care of your health and wellbeing. This is especially true if you have others that rely on you – after all, you can’t pour from an empty cup!
Healthy self-love begins with an accurate view of who we are. There are no cookie cutter persons, each and every one of us is special and unique, and that means you, it means me.
Having an accurate view of ourselves, we recogniz our weaknesses and our strengths and accept both. It has nothing to do with thinking that we are right all the time. We don't judge our self-worth through comparisons, nor do we belittle ourselves.
It is unhealthy to go through our lives filled with hate, disappointment, or insecurities about ourselves. It's knowing who we are and how wonderful we were created.
Healthy self-love means that you accept yourself fully, treat yourself with kindness and respect, and nurture your growth and wellbeing.
The Golden Rule
We've all heard the golden rule, (it's actually a scripture) "Love your neighbor as yourself." We must love others as truly and sincerely as we love ourselves; in many cases we must deny ourselves for the good of others. We must love ourselves in the proper degree without selfishness.
We do not allow self-love to turn into self-focus, making a god of ourselves or placing our desires above all else. If we do not love ourselves, we cannot love others.
Loving yourself certainly makes it easier to love someone else.
Do you treat yourself the same way you treat your loved-ones? You deserve the same love and care as others. Once you've succeeded at loving yourself, you will then be able to completely love someone else.
Be Kind To Yourself
If you are not kind to yourself, you will not be kind to others either. Practicing self-love helps you to be kind because you become aware of how good it feels to be gentle and kind to yourself, so you want to make others feel that way also.
Self-love makes us more loving and kind to others.
When you love yourself you can be comfortable in your own skin and be true to yourself, and not rely on others to give their approval of you. You learn to not care what others think about you, and quit compairing yourself to others.
A portion of self-love is realizing that we all make mistakes, so we don't beat ourselves up over our mis-haps or bad decisions. We forgive ourselves and move on.
Self-love is giving yourself the encouragement you need to deal with difficulties, set goals, and sometimes even just to help you get through the day. It is rising above negative situations or hardships and cheering yourself on in spite of them.
Practice complimenting and encouraging yourself, especially when you don't think you're good enough or not doing enough. Notice self-judgment for what it is, and take a positive approach with words of kindness and acceptance to yourself.
Practicing self-love can improve everything from depression to addiction, anxiety, discontent, and a host of other unbeneficial emotions or states of disease.
We just have to open ourselves up to the tools that are out there and be willing to dig deeper.
Know Your Are Capable Of Much
When we love ourselves we come to know that we can achieve amazing feats in life. We never underestimate ourselves and when we don't achieve right away, we try again and don't give up.
Tapping into your creativity and passion is one key component; another is slowing down and taking the time to rest, reflect, rejuvenate, and practice self-care.
Practice gratitude journaling. This can lower stress and improve a sense of calm. When we look at all the good things we have to be grateful for in our lives, it’s a lot easier to put the aggrivating things into perspective. It also allows us to practice self-love, feel happier, and become more resilient.
Beware of self-judgment. Remember that feelings aren’t rational and they will lie to you. Whatever you feel is okay, and it’s okay if you don’t know why you feel the way you do. What is important is acceptancing your feelings and the positive actions you take to nurture yourself.